take my HAND; and GUIDE me through*
Tuesday, June 28, 2005
4:08 PM
i'm an idiot i know..
*sigh*.....went to ts yesterday..was really tired..not enough sleep somemore..and have to work..still wanna go..yeez was really mad at me...made her wait long..i as late..went to the bank to do some stuff..............shouldn't have go..but still iwanted to go...what was i thinking?that he will be there?
haih..end up..he's there...another coincidence?so long never see d..again..he appear there when i really wanted to see him...everytime it happens..when i really wanted to see him..he will be there somehow even though he normally doesn't..that's why i say is this a gift from above?if it is..i hope it last...
i don't know what to say..a lot of things happen yesterday..in a way..i don't feel like describing..well maybe a little bit...well i didn't know he was there..until yeez msg me saying he's there..i was on the way that time..and so i wanted to make sure..so i call her back..and guess who pick up the phone?yea..him..was really surprised..i recognized that voice..well was kinda happy..how long have i not listen to his voice?dei...........
well so went there loh......haih..it's really not me lah..he did those small little stuff again...i'm not oversensitive sial...caught him peeking at me...well.. i did that too..i think he saw too..damn man...got once when he was at the back at me..standing really behind.. i kinda turn and look..sial mana tau he looking also..surely saw i look at him..damn man!haih...i dunno lah...got once he kinda pull his friend away and stand his friend's place......where it was like kinda beside me..his friend was luaghing at him..he was on my left side..i was standing beside the machine..so i take the iniative to talk to him loh..since before that i already talk to most of the guys i know there except him..(i dunno what got into me..wanna say hi to him but end up saying hi to almost everyone else there except him..anyway he was also playing mah when i came that time)..i didn't know what to say..so i kinda ask about his hair..what happen to his electric shock hair..he didn't reply but his hand straight away kind a went up and do his hair..his hair was gel by the way and quite nice..he didn't dare look at me..just doing his hair..and did i see his ear turn red?hmm..maybe it's my imagination.. i felt really weird and so i went over to find yeez and stand with her at the opposite side...haih..but later on..he start talking to me lah..when i change coins that time..he call and ask why did i took out my level 20 evo 4..then start talking loh...so i reply yeez wanna play for fun mah..then i walk back to yeez and he follow also..(yeez battling with my car)...when yeez battle that time..he stand beside me..and ask lots of i think stupid question..more like babbling nonsense..haih..if i were him..maybe i will ask nonsense also lah..i did what..about his hair..it's nonsense..but anyway was kinda happy..he also ask if i have any car that i don't want to play anymore,give it to him....including the evo 4..if i don't want to work anymore..and i don't really understand..and both of us like mumbling there...haih..and in the end he never finish his words...and just say nevermind lah..and look away..maybe it's my imagination again..his ear was red??!hmmm....anyway..i wasn't feeling too well myself..i was babbling nonsense too..and i feel my face feel hot...and i was a bit too happy too when talking...wtf is wrong with me?oh..and he didn't know that jean in soul calibur was me..he say now wonder sounds so familiar and he always beat that character up..dei..and then i say it's me lah!no wonder got so many loses i told him..then he was grinning/smiling and showing this "oh shit!don't know what to do" look there....hahaha..funny..so i guess i won't be seeing so many loses anymore..?or maybe more?hahahha....oh..and ppl use my evo 4 to help me battle yesterday too...and later got one rx-7 challenge..so bad go and chosoe akagi downhill wet..my car really drifty and ligh( cause of the soiler lah)..he help me play..i expected to lose one..but he won..he play really nice somemore i saw..must learn..then the next match lose loh..same map i think..but he did his very best lah..at least he never gave up in the end..haih..after that got a few times saw him giving me peeks again..dei...i did too..that's why i know..dei he surely know i looking at him..dei...got quite a lot of times i did that he was doing also..so kena caught..damn sial!and somemore yesterday he was like standing close by to me most of the time...got few times was like side by side somemore..feel happy lah of course..that's y easily kena caught..haih..haih...HAIH!
haih...when i wanna play outbound with my shared dc..he left already..i really wanna show him i did improve..i'm not that bad d..haih always like that..look at me..i improve..at most of the track..i'm not that bad nemore..haih..
he change number already..haih..give yeez his number also don't give me..normal lah...embarassing mah...at least i know now..if not lost contact d then how...really scared..and yesterday yeez say he maybe got gf d..i felt a stab of pain...i mean stop doing those stuff lah to me if u got gf d..don't understand....but later found out don't have lah...thanx to yeez..really thank her for helping..i really appreciate what you have done for me...although i'm damn leceh and susah but you still help me..amd i know i always make u angry and can be really like and idiot sometimes..but thank you...
haih...before i know that...i was like thinking and don't understand...i was looking like a zombie...and can u believe it..?i went home looking like a zombie...umm..unknowingly bath myself twice straight in a row...lost my appetite..took me 1 hour to finish my dinner..and i broke two plates while washing the dishes..plus flooded my own room..more like sitting there staring in the space..exactly like a zombie..can't do my work or anything..omg!!wtf is wrong with me?i mean good lah if he found someone else..but just don't understand...why is he doing those stuff to me while he got another girl d..haih...i just can't believe i was that affected...but in the end found out it's not lah.he don't have lah..haih...somehow i still think the feelings are still there...if not why are u doing the same fucking idiotic stuff i'm doing?all his idiot fucking low self esteem fault!!!fuck the low self esteem lah!!somehow i rather think it's my english lah...fuck lah..u think last time i'm good izzit?i was from a chinese school for god sake and my english was really damn fucking broken when i was still in standard 6!!u know ppl laugh at me also??!and do you know i read those books i don't understand..i just blindly reading it..that's how i slowly learn..i don't understand but i still read!!and slowly i learn and improve!and my family don't really speak english at home also!!dei..everyone have to start somewhere and everyone work hard to improve..!!..!!and that's how i got my english proficiency or whatever u wanna call it..although it's not good enough but i'm still learning and impoving..i still sux at pronounciation sometimes..the word "soup" and "soap".."mosquito"..some ppl would know what i'm talking about here..that's how bad i was last time...ok??!i'm not good lah!!i'm not even an "A" student!!i'm just an average student ok??don't think i'm smart lah.........haih.......fucK low self esteem!!
don't bother..i'm just crapping above..don't know what got into me.............i'm sick..tired...missing that donkey badly again??!!..really wanted to miscall his new number...stress over my work which is fucking going to be last minute..!!!!!!!!!!!!!having a hard time stopping my fingers from dialing the number..i'm looking like an idiot picking and putting down the phone countless time............................................
FUCK EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
oh..rosh coming back next month 15...he fucking msg me 3 am in the morning to ask about nad...so kan cheung about nad..just because nad change her hairstyle..she cut her hair..but still blond..short and nice..still very nice..she do her hair in a way..haih funny dei she..bring that big mirror to school somemore the first few days after she cut her hair....vain sial...somemore can bring it out and look into the mirror in front o f public..and even when in the car..she stop for the traffic light the time..ppl all looking must be think what's wring with this girl..haih.we laugh somemore..she's just so funny lah..nad..nad..that's her lah..anyway a lot of ppl say she look nice with short hair also..cute and chic...and got one girl somemore say she's the most stylish one in our class..haih..boost her self esteem lah..nad there happy..so funny lah!!and then when ppl know aout her age and she got a kid somemore..all shock and say she look so young..like 20 something..nad there damn funny again..look so happy and do that kind of look..funny lah she!!it's her lah anyway..beauty comes first for her...hahahha..sometimes really we are so different and yet can be close...life is weird....she's really special lah..she's not like any of those bitches..and she also help me a lot in many ways..although sometimes i show my temper and can be really irritating sometimes..but really thanx to racoon and orso who stick by my side when i need them and help me all this while...i really appreciate our friendship..oh damn..why am i getting all emotional...dei..oh ya..forgot one thing. dunno what's wrong with roach..keep saying racoon look ugly and all....say she old lah..her beauty will fade lah..haahhaa..bet they are having an sms-war now...this roach ah..purposely wanna have a fight with racoon only...and then later want to merajuk..haih..roach roach..still the same never change...but sad..we lost our roach page..still haven't tell roach yet..and he got the cheek to call me lowest of the scum again that day!!he's the one looking like an afghan refugee!!shave and lose weight!!he refuse to do that..!see lah!!wanna say racoon somemore..!!
haih...mixed feelings..............................................................feeling better for now..haih..haih........but dunno why damn miss that donkey??at least got to see him yesterday..haihhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh......................................as i say fuck the hell out of everything!!haih..chivas anyone?hahahahhaa..........=p..wait till roach come back?hmm....that one also no 1 cheap-O!haih...
dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no dadei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da dei no da!!
© Enigma
0 person have hold my hands, have you?
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hold me TIGHT; and NEVER let go*
take my HAND; and GUIDE me through*
Thursday, June 23, 2005
10:29 PM
crazy me..!!you!!
was tired today..and didn't really slept well the night before..had a dream again..bout him..omg..what's wrong with me?too long never see d izzit?haihz... can't believe i can miss a person that badly..wtf is wrong with me?mentally drained....why are you back to haunting me again?invading my mind again...*sigh*....i thought i was back..??all i need now is my studies..studies..arghh!!this is fucking depressing...who am i kidding?feel like fucking everything up and go to the island!!!fuck my studies!!fuck my work!!fuck my life!fuck him!just fuck everything...
I'm dying...................................am i?well..still hanging alive though....oh and class was depressing too..me and nad going to die sial...in that class..I MISS ADP!!!u know or not..all nerds in my class!!today i finally realise..sial...all fucking study like hell and i can't believe everyone even that "so-called" bitches listen to that fucked up lembu lembik..and even participate askingquestions...all really pay attention..i dunno how they can stay in a class like that...and all really serious in their studies one...and do you know not more than 1 person is absent in class??and it's not only 1 class..all the classes!!and do you none of them "ponteng" class??last time adp...after they sign names..u can see ppl started to leave and a lot will be leaving after the break time..but this one...OMG..they are even so damn punctual and come back for their break time in really accurately 10 minutes?!?!!!and the class start already also..and do you know even it's boring also nobody SLEEP??can u believe that i'm the only one sleeping in class??and nobody even bother to look at me as they were too busy concentrating in class..nad also wanna sleep but she can tahan one..last time also same lah..i always ask her to pinch me to keep me awake..but she also say..all damn serious one..all potential A student..OMG!!!!and can't even joke and kutuk lecturer all..i miss adp..and the people...at least last time..got mee fen,ah bin and girls also...even azral also ok..even biadawak also..and a lot more..can joke all and really laugh...and each class surely got naughty students or funny one..this program??!!!!they are nice ppl lah..but TOO SERIOUS LAH!!!!nerds sial..........all like goody two shoe type....nad say so....mee fen also misses us...haih..we use to have so much fun in class..and entertaining in a way..but now...haih..all really not our type sial..nad say...and all so good...all A students...feel pressure..and start to panic d..haven't even fucking study yet..what if we are the only worse one in class??all so good??sekali all get A's then only us get B's...dei!!it's still very bad lah!!cannot stand lah..we are suffocating in here..lucky still have each other..but still not that much fun already..only 2 of us..(but today laugh like hell when me make new names for ppl..there's so many weird ppl in our this program sial,laugh until stomache pain..haih..if only the others were here..we can share..miss them the adp people..)and can u believe got one student actually keep a newspapaer cutting of 2003 of some old war thingy..??omg??who keep a newspaper cutting on old war for so long???and one laig worse..read the whole book already???maybe got more but we dunno..??u tell me all this is "A" student or not?dei..can't even skip classes..cause no one doing it.. and we will be the only one..and surely everyone know since we have only round 60 of us..=(...miss the flexible life we used to have in adp..and the people...*sigh*..we did try turning into nerds but keep failing...somehow we can't sit still for hours and study sial..maybe the night before exams can lah?we always have time for other stuff but no time for studies...what's wrong with us ah?haih..nad also say..we are just lazy lah...but we know we can do it if we really want to..even possible to get an "A"..hahahha..but we just can't be bother....dei..it doesn't suit us lah...i will die without entertainment..!!at least plz lah...don't only talk bout studies and work..hey ppl..enjoy life..don't be so serious..life is short....it's not all about study study and study..u spent half ur lifetime studying,another half working, then ur life is gone..so when's the time for play?u don't enjoy now,when will you?...hey,ppl..don't be so serious...what's wrong with u all??all maybe it's something wrong with us?we don't suits here??
I lost my notebook..no more roach page,pari page,nerd page,circus elephant page,...all gone!!all our creation!!!!and we just started on staff in our college page..all gone!!i want back my nerd page lah and roach page..!!pari page also nice..and ce page!!haih..want to start drawing and writing all over again also susah..forget already...noooooooooooooooo...why did i lost my notebook??somemore i like the "mortein knockdown" in roach page..coloured in red somemore...so nice..and all the things inside the page..haih..want to do again also hard..and it take time to do even one page..somemore there's so many page more waiting for us to do..me and nad theory page,racoon page for her and rodent page for me...now takkan want to start all over again?..our creation all gone....sad...
oh..yesterday idiot roach called and play a fool on us..say he's back in malaysia all..idiot!!call twice somemore..really sound like it..mana tau finally found out he's still in australia!!wastemy money msg him so many times...still don't wanna tell the truth..suddenly say he;s in australia,suddenly say no actually in malaysia..then again say i australia..then..etc..idiot!!so i msg shaz and ask...and finally found out that donkey is still in australia..coming back only next month..make us happy for nothing..ceh..wanna fool us somemore...wait till u come back roach,u gonna get it from us!!hahahha...miss the old times..where we had lotsa fun..the 3R's + shaz..heh...and so long never hear roach's bitching d..hahaha..come back surely bitch like hell and R2 also..hahaha..so long no driving d also....and nad starting to miss mcd already..so long never eat mcd and go "jungle" d..since roach left...no time also..break in between classes is short..1 hour,where got enough?
haih..oklah..suppose to at least start doing my donkey assignments one..no mood dei..dueing on thursday..only done one day work..still got 4 days left and writing and typing to do...last minute again??haih...missing a person that badly...this is really fucking depressing....well..maybe it's just the time to get depressed??damn...so many feelings..worry?sad?pain?sick?stress?tired?missing?haih..i think i'm having bipolar depression again??can be laughing so damn happy at one moment and the next moment can be in tears and all..wtf?this is sadistic??argggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!my cure=him?really wonder how is he doing??omg...........wtf is wrong with me???i guess it must be all the stress...maybe..haih..missing...when will you appear?really miss ya...
mad mad mad mad mad mad mad mad mad mad mad mad mad mad mad mad mad mad mad crazy crazy crazy crazy crazy crazy crazy crazy crazy crazy crazy crazy crazy crazy crazy crazy you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you miss you you you you you you you miss you you you you you you you miss you you you you you you you you you you you miss you you you you you you you you you miss you you you you you you you you you
why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why
argggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!
© Enigma
0 person have hold my hands, have you?
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hold me TIGHT; and NEVER let go*
take my HAND; and GUIDE me through*
Wednesday, June 22, 2005
12:46 AM
tired....why him again???
Today damm tired..yesterday slept late and got ato be at college by 8.15…meaning I’ll have to be out of the house 7.15..so tired……..nothing much..we did observation again in tutorial..last week was see whether female or male use their right foot or left foot to step the stairs first..she set already and let us choose..today’s topic we have to come out with our own..my group did on gender and type of bags..slingbag vs haversack…somemore this time cannot choose our own group..ms.w kinda put us in groups…me nad nad different group..hehe..but it’s ok..i got to know more ppl..and my group is consider nice…oh well..at least now get to know more ppl already..somemore we are the first batch mah..so we will be closer compare to ther other batches..so have to know more ppl in the class..well..a lot of nice ppl in this program..i’m beginning to really like this program..i get to start anew..and the work are fine…(currently)..ppl are helpful too…but we are kind like being marked just cause we are ex-adp students..haih..ms.w marked us more strictly..dei last last week the group activity we did in class..we got lower than the other groups cause we are suppose to know the stuff already since there’s 3 ex-adp student in our group that time(including me and nad)..so we all get lower marks..cis..and the new students all also like expect you to know something if you are ex-adp student when doing group activities…will look to you and ask you to like explain this and that..and we are like suppose to gives the ideas and all…dei just because we are adp students…doesn’t mean we know everything??!!haih…being marked sial..kinda unfair…miss those ppl back in adp..although we still see each other..but haih…Oh ya,..during our 11/2 hour observation at the main gate there..saw DBKL tow away 2 cars…wahahahha..interesting sial!!poor car…one is Mercedes somemore..the car kena towed away..funny dei!!!Today…haih..i went to t.s..shouldn’t..but went in the end….suppose to finish up my work..i was hoping to see him although I know the chances are not high..haih..good also lah people didn’t come..at least he got go school and he didn’t go out to play or whatsoever on a school day..haih..it’s been 3 weeks since I last saw him…really feel like seeing..what to do..i’m trying so hard to put my name beside yours in the machine..how long have I been doing that already?I wanna pull the distance..but somehow I still haven’t got that kind of skills yet lah..goodlah..today someone manage to put her name beside mr.h…me?100 centuries lah….that’s one of the reason I start soul calibur also..don’t you know?it’s because of you also…I want to put my name beside yours..or the ranking close to yours..since ID I can’t do it already..at least I still can do it in soul calibur..at least my ranking is not that far in soul calibur…hopeless….i will still try ID though..one day..I’ll manage to do it…haihzz…..today went I went to toilet the time in ts..i saw a couple..and the guy was like walking the girl to the toilet..haih..remind me of the times he walk me to the toilet…somemore I’m in the place where it all happened…after all..t.s is the place we met..hahha..more accurately the arcade in ts..hahaha..somehow..this place mean something to me…it’s not just an arcade..haih..damn!damn!wtf?what am I thinking? Dammit!!!suddenly wanna miss that idiot so much?haih..somemore wanna see where ppl stay..he told me before roughly the location..and I think I’m getting closer to pinpoint the area already..that day sit bus also got pass by there..i saw the road already…saw the store also..it’s somewhere near the store…haihz..if got car surely round there already… wonder if everything’s all well with him?is he doing ok?wish that he would appear..even for a moment..it's enough..haih..where got so easy?going there once a week..somemore weekday..no more fridays..weekends..my job and studies...wtf??what’s wrong with me??damN!damn!!sad..sad….had a dream again bout him..haih…fuck it!study..study…study…..work..work work!!~missing you~……would you be there the next time?or the next next time?next..next..next..etc..time?haihzzz...HOPELESS me!
© Enigma
0 person have hold my hands, have you?
<< Home >>
hold me TIGHT; and NEVER let go*
take my HAND; and GUIDE me through*
Sunday, June 19, 2005
3:55 PM
leceh lembu lembik
hahha..that day finally got the chance to hentam that leceh lembu lembik..course evaluation!!wahaha..or course i wrote down lots of stuff lah.....hope she kena!!she should change neway..how can she teach like that??we are playing our money here leh...haih..new lecturers!!got a few more somemore...dunno whether they are good or not..*sigh*..who ask those ppl all leaving?..that "green mile" went to do his research bout to get his doctorate...until now haven't come back..maybe 1 year lah...doin his researchs on bomohs in malaysia...why ppl are more willingto go to bomohs instead of psychologists in malaysia when there's a problem..something like that lah...dunno fly where already also..and that dr. j they say he go US the APA there to present his research or journal duno what is that also..present till now haven't come back??not coming back izzit...gone...haih..that's why lah..so many unqualified lecturers like lembu lembik lah coming in...ppl all going out..dunno bout the others new lecturer though..but i dun have a good impression towards new lecturers d...cause of this lembu lembik.....
oh...did i mention nad became darker?she went to redang...now she's in singapore d...went back the weekends for cousin wedding..anyway she funny lah!in redang..embarassed herself only..she went snorkeling all..then sekali a big fish swimming towards her..she got so scared she scream..somemore wearing that snorkeling stuff all u know..can scream soemmore wearing that mask all..and running(more like swimming?)..like mad woman like that..waving hands also i think got...and everyone was like looking at her...so funny dei!because of a big fish.....hahhaha..funny dei!malu only lah!!hahahhaha..a bit like me sial...she memang funny lah..
oh and that idiot roach got the cheek to tell me he gain weight again!!135 kg??wtf??!135??before he went was 107kg------>now 135..omg..we ask him to lose weight..see lah dun want to listen,,ask us to fuck off soemmore..padan!!now sccared already!roach...me and racoon dunno you if you still don't lose weight and shave!!u hear that?WE will ignore you..if you still don't want to lose weight and shave!!!hahahhahhahha.............u better do so before u come back..don't look like an afghan refugee!!
oh ya..yesterday went to celebrate donkey yeez bday...went to bayu timor..eeee...dun mention carrot already..until now i still somehoe can smell the carrot smell.....no more carrots for me for a while.....anyway gave her the presents and cake..ppl somemore so "geng"..the people there sing for her bday song...hahahahhaha..not to mention the extra plates,fork..and oh..straws...what an unforgettable bday??!hahahhaha....then later we went to mutiara damansarar there..ikano power centre lah...get to see pets..!!wheee...the dogs so cuteeeee....kawaii!!!and oh i saw a talking parrot....hahahha..somebody nvr get the chance to see it talk..hahhaa..then we went to popular...hmm..i don't see the old staff there anymore...they say those atria staff all went there..but now..i don't even recognize one of them..*sigh*..where they all went...??haih....neway.its really big..and they even sell mangas..but all wrap uP!cannot read!!!oh and manage to learn a bit of japanese yesterday also..went to read those learning japanese book??!hahha..eh,dunno whether ppl still know how to say "my name is....."in japanese or not..hahahha..i still remember!!
oh..i just realize i lost my notebook..damn sial..i think i left it in college..die d..inside got lots of stuff..i hope nobody takes it..someore got draw funny pics about the lecturers sial...me and nad's creation!!someomore got the roach page inside also...i hope it's still there on tuesday...no classes 2morow..plz let it be there...
oh..and maybe we are getting streamynx!!finally!!!90%..bro call today...that 's why..seelah bro say one word it's so much better than me saying 10 times..haih..call up the streamynx ppl and ask bout the info all d..going to register..hope so..=)..then can play gb everyday also nevermind already!!or online 24 hrs!!hahah..can download all my stuff also....yeah!fast somemore!!
haih..this week gonna be busy?missing him...*sigh*...hopeless sial...now can go once a week only..how to see..?weekdays somemore...haih...of course lah nvr turn up.....haih...
oklah..me off to gb d!!I wanna level up..that day got a fish..damn nice...at least my percentage rise back...rising back soon anyway...missing......
© Enigma
0 person have hold my hands, have you?
<< Home >>
hold me TIGHT; and NEVER let go*
take my HAND; and GUIDE me through*
Thursday, June 09, 2005
11:58 PM
Damn tired!i'm dying...
i'm so damm busy......finish my presentation d...it was good!!i can say the best??wahahha..of course lah..use ms.w's example all..her notes also help a lot..sial..if not..surely die,if only use this lembu lembik punya stuff..don't even know how to teach!she was impressed with our presentation..hahha..and she wanted to use our presentation handouts as revision for the class..anyway..seh said we really did a good job consider last minute and for the first group and we even manage to make the audience laugh with our examples..hahah..all ms.w one..and we even manage to joke..she say good work..and walau..our other group member really know his stuff sial..and all of us talk until loud and clear and really like we are the lecturers standing there teaching..and even thought the guy was shaking..he still can go on talking..and really good that kind..still can give examples and explained in details..normally ppl too scared d will just blank out and read straight..oh..and this is the first time nad and me never read straight from the power point..and we elaborate ourself..dei..and nad say this is the first time she see me present that good..normally i stage fright until i will just speak so softly and mumbling there..dei..this time loud and clear and somemore can look at the audience and give examples and joke..omg!!izzit after so many presentations d?or izzit because most of the them new students that's y not scared?or izzit a small class??but we were good lah!!she was relly impressed with us!!and the best part is those who don't understand her lectures,understands our presentation..??!!we became the lecturers??hahahha....was damm happy sial..this is the best presentation we ever had!!maybe is because we know our stuff d??i really thank ms.w lah..she memang good lah!!
anyway gonna be very busy soon..lots of work..and i need to study..so damm tired..last night slept at 5 and then have to wake up at 8 something and go college to prepare and then classes are until 6 today..so damm tired..but *phew* at least we finish already..can do other assignments now..not like others..still need to stress over it..and now everyone is like taking our presentation as a guideline..lembu lembik somemore announce to the class that whoever wants a copy of our presntation can come and ask us..and somemore say it's good for revision..heh=)..we were really happy lah..!!we shook hands and all after that with the guy and say good job..soememore our group short of one member u know..cause the other girl stop the course already..
klah..tired..2morow working full day somemore..have to open the door again..somehow i'm feeling very lazy and tired to work..*sigh*..still have so many assignments coming..haven't study also..and my boss gave me something to do at home(no time limit lah..but still..)oh ya,she brought back chocolate for me from australia..haih..but somehow i prefer christina...dunno y..i'm kinda stress out lately too..make stupid mistakes..and kinda pressure sial..feel that i'm incompetent..always scared that i didn't do well enough..i got the feeling she thinks i'm a bad worker or unefficient...maybe it's just me?i dunno..haih..stress sial..maybe that's y i prefer christina?soemhow i feel easy with her..i don't feel the pressure that i need to do something perfectly every single time..can even relax a bit....*sigh*...maybe it's college?..now i'm beginning to feel the workload already...and yet still got the time to think of him once in a while..*sigh*..missing..feel like seeing..haih..tired..sick..stress..i really feel like taking a break from work...
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Sunday, June 05, 2005
5:24 PM
Presentation...
presentation next week dei!!we are the first group!!!arghhhhhhhhhh.......and just found out that we aren't same group as the 2 new student we gotten to know..me and nad same..heh=)..susah lah like that...all that bloody lecturer who dunno how to teach fault..say she arrange..ppl all other classes sendiri find group but this donkey here..by the way she got a new name..me and nad gave her a new name d..leceh lembu lembik...she's also as leceh as SLOT and she like to sit down n teach and also like no energy to even open a door??wtf??everything also need ppl to help..like lembik only...anyway that lembu lembik says it's our responsibilities to go and contact our other group members..walau..our presentation is like nxt week??helloo..how to do last minute work with a person we dun really know??susah lah...she purposely separate all off us one..cause when everyone sign up for the topics the time..all put like in one group like that..and different topics,different day..and that will be our tutorial time also...wtf??other classes we choose our own tutorial one..seelah..lucky me and nad got reason..so that's y we are in the same group,we went up and tell her..me got work,so i really need the thursday time one,friday got work..nad say she is required to stay home on fridays to look after hans..which is kinda half true..hahahha..well,at least she's nice..she say she can allowed us to have the thursday time one but we can't tell anyone bout it cause everyone wants the thursday time one,since we have no classes on fridays...hahaha..well but the sad thing is now kena separate fro mthe 2 students we knew d..haih..if not, then easy to work with cause 1 is an adp student also last time and he can do animation stuff,so it will help a lot for the power point..and another girl is quite nice,gotten to know her on thursday itself..chatted quite a lot..and i found out through online that she's also into these anime stuff!!and she got mangas!!we can exchange!!and u know what??she knows japanese!!!!she's learning it for dunno how long d..now advanced level d..and als time graduated from this japanese school i think..teikyo..and she work before in a japanese company...she really know how to speak and write that kind..expert sial..i want her to teach..she say she can teach me since she's also currently looking to be a part time tutor in japanese..hahaha..she gave me the number to her school...will call and ask the price for the course..and i found out we had like a lot of same interest!!she's interested in learning different kind of language too..she say her nxt language will be german...i want!!!i told her i knew elementary italian a bit..hahah..she's so jealous i get to learn it in adp..she say she wanted to learn italian also..and she have penpals from over the world...they have this kind of association thingy...and next time we can take our electives together..nad no need to take electives=(...and also we can take lan together..she also haven't done her moral studies in a-level..hahaha..what a coincidence..i also haven't take moral studies in adp..both of us only done malaysian studies..nad no need to take moral also since itnernational students don't require to take..at least now got aa friend,not that bad if we have any group work..well..anyway a nice person overall..at least not bitchy..too many bitches in my this new program d i realize...fuck off lah bitch!ignore me lah..go ahead..go on giving me that look..so what?so what i dont dress like u?so what if i look like a nerd? look....go ahead..i have what u won't have..hahaha..i have true friends..u??hahahha....bitches!anyway..that's a number of nice ppl also in this new program...=)
oh ya..2morow i need to go to work early..need to open the doors..christina couldn't make it 2morow..hahha..she's going holiday-ing..she call up my boss d of course..so she came and pick me up and we both went to the center and she show me how to open the doors yesterday..hmm..well.. anyway..get to learn more things again..=)..she's going to pd..her husand give her a surprise..they going to the new place where they have this chalets on the sea..(nad went there in april i think..)..well..christina say she like that place a lot..but that time when she went there for honeymoon the time..this thing just launched so nvr go i think and last time cheap 150 bucks for 3 days 2 nights..now u know how much ah??600 bucks per night??!?!omg..nad also got say expensive...rosh's family of friends i forgot who got went there before also..the name i forgot lah..nad,rosh and christina got mention but i can't remember..will ask nad the nxt time i see her..walau..that place really that nice huh?hmm...=/
oh well....going off to play gb now..omg..the bill is gonna be so expensive!!still trying to persuade dad to get streamynx..haih..the cafe around here haven't got the new version of gb yet..=/..friday went to yeez to sg long to play there..since the cafes there really updated..got the new version of gb..i went up to the cafe to play while yeez go to her class loh..then later we went for lunch and went up to the cafe again..she's a member there..i sign up to become a member also since it's free..now can enjoy member rate..we got a shared account specially for training..open one that day..so i used that account and trained the 2 new mobiles loh..kinda know how to use d..then later i didn't play much of gb cause server's down so i was bored.yeez ther playing 02jam like so nice like that..so heh..i register for a ccount and play also..but i'm not planning to spend money to work on it..i play those songs for free one loh..play without jams one..the only bad thing is can only get to play limited songs and cannot level up loh..if want to,have to buy the point cards lah..waste money..but i was so addicted to it..never touch gb at all after that..keep practicing o2jam only..haih..beginning to get addicted d..nooo..die lah..somemore later on goin to start ro..don't tell me another addicting game again??dei no dah!study!study!study!i'm going to play lesser of gb once i reach double gold axe..since to level up after that need s to depends on the percentage of user with certain amounts of gps..so it's no point working too hard over it..my level now double metal axe d..banned from the beginner zone d..have to go to those other zone where there are all pros..look down on ppl somemore..=(..now can join guild d..but not planning to join one at the moment..see first later..
this week no ID..since yeez staying sg long there...haih..means no seeing him..ppl holiday somemore surely go..haih...what's wrong with me?hopeless!!had a dream again...haih..hopeless me.....*sigh*...missing...
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Wednesday, June 01, 2005
11:58 PM
today
well..today...went to ts..no work..really don't feel like going,feel like going to cafe more..but they haven't download the new version of gb yet..so what's the point??well..ming teng wanted to go too..t ospent some time..i mean ts...have to wait for that donkey yeez so long..ppl stuck in sg long there waiting for the 1 hour bus??!!my god..both of us like 2 idiots..waiting at kl central...and there she tell me she's still in sg long??!!so end up..ming teng went home..and i have to go ts to wait for yeez alone....so i went to borders..thinking to read some comics..and u know what??!they wrap it up already!!!!this is just not my day...i didn't want to come here...so many ppl her e..school holiday and know can't even enkoy a comic at borders???!!well..the novel all are not wrap up though..only the comics..*sigh*..i wasn't in the mood to read any books..so i choose to read archie instead......that later that donkey took like almost 1 hour to reach ts..so went up....memang got lot of ppl..crowded..somehow rather i hate crowded places...and i don't like to be among those crowd..wasn't in the mood...i went round the whole place looking to see if he's there,but in vain...i wonder did he come?he always do during school holiday....haih..and later only got to know that he just left.........thought cannot get to see him already..really wanted to..but later u know what?he turn up at night...*sigh*....is that a good thing or bad?it happens everytime..whenever i hope that i can see him..and he will just pop out..is this a gift again?well..he's wearing a cap..ahhaha..must be too many ppl laugh at his electric shock hair already...he don't like ppl laughing at him one wat..easily embarassed..hahaha..well we are really back on talking terms already...he's not being a wall anymore..got laugh and all...good..i hope this last...tease yeez like hell again..hahahha..at first when he came..i didn't notice him..i was too "into" watching the battle..then suddenly i walk back to yeez place and saw him standing behind her..yeez didn;t notice..she too busy battling already..i was kinda shocked...i look at him and he look at me..haih..i didn't know what to do..it was like a real shock to see him there...*sigh*..dei...i dunno lah..but i'm happy to get to see him...oh by the way, i have started training for outbound track already today..consider got improvement..thanx to yeez for teaching..and all the other tracks is ok also consider so long never play..surprisingly the skills is there somehow..play until although is kinda shit but not too bad..after 1-2 rounds then will be ok already i think...and now training outbound already..feel at least i'm not one of the worst player...felt much much better..play more ID than usual..especially outbound..haih..when he's there when during one of my outbound training,i cannot concentrate..drive like shit...*Sigh*..i cannot drive well whenever he's there..i don't know why somehow..whatever track also..even my master track..i cjust lose all my concentration when i know he's near me...fuck man..what's wrong with me??i really want to show him that i improve..a lot of times i want to drive my best to show him that i now not that bad already and i know how to drive other maps already...but whenever he come then i drive badly...why the hell in the firs place i want to show him that i improve?want him to be proud of this "student" izzit?at least let him know i'm not a lost case izzit???what am i trying to prove?every single time i want to show him..but every single time when he happen to stop by..i will lose all my concentration and drive like shit!!he will think i'm still so bad!!i dun want him to think that way lah!!dei cannot lah!!look..look at me...i don't drive that shitty normally..*sigh*..but i always fail to prove to you..to show u...what's wong with me? <(=.=)> i dunno really............at least we are back being friends..as in the kind that talk..not a wall anymore...i'm really happy that i finally broken down that wall??!how many efforts i took??*sigh*....it's always bout him...why?why?hopeless.....i'm really happy tha i get to see him today though..but really..is it just a coincidence or what?every single time when i really want to see you..you will just appear even though you don't normally do...you seems to know that i want to see you and you will just appear there..or izzit that u wanted to see me also..haih..is this a miracle?a gift from above?tired..have to slp early..go loo...ooooong day tomorrow..have to be at college 8.45??till 5??omg!!tiring!!!good also no gb for me..if not surely going to play till late night and will be like a zombie 2morow...
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hold me TIGHT; and NEVER let go*
take my HAND; and GUIDE me through*
what??
oh no....gb is up..but i can't play...=(..need to download and the cafe haven't download the new version yet..damn..how long have to wait???this is bad.......................dei..no da!!!*sigh*....so slow the download....i want streamnyx!!!!grrrrrr.......well..now streamnyx got promotion somemore...free modem??dei...oh and pet bro is gonna help me ask..and pull some strings in streamynx..heh=)so can charge cheaper..he know ppl there....his friend and his gf's friend work there...that's y..quite high post somemore...thanks man for helping me...somemore kinda sponsoring me playing ro..used his account to learn first he say...-_-..i'm a useless pet sis who do nothing..heh=) and yet he there helping...??lol...
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hold me TIGHT; and NEVER let go*
