take my HAND; and GUIDE me through*
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
8:57 PM
MIA in progress AGAIN..
DAMMIT!!FUCKING FRUSTRATED!ANGRY!ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!WHY ME?!?!HAMPA BETUL..AND I DUWAN TO TALK ABOUT IT...I WANNA GO MIA AGAIN....
i miss you.
© Enigma
0 person have hold my hands, have you?
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hold me TIGHT; and NEVER let go*
take my HAND; and GUIDE me through*
Sunday, May 24, 2009
12:29 AM
しんゆう
あなたはわがままなひとです。
© Enigma
0 person have hold my hands, have you?
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hold me TIGHT; and NEVER let go*
take my HAND; and GUIDE me through*
Friday, May 22, 2009
11:47 PM
Understanding
Sometimes seeking for understanding is so hard.
Sigh.
Somethings are kept in heart and cannot be told.
That's just the way isn't it.
Circumstances I have.
I'm so tired and so busy do anyone actually know?
I guess not.
They do and they do not.
It always come back to the same circle.
I just want some understanding that's all.
Is it that hard?
© Enigma
0 person have hold my hands, have you?
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hold me TIGHT; and NEVER let go*
take my HAND; and GUIDE me through*
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
10:15 PM
T.i.r.e.d
I'm dead tired..gosh..I really mean dead tired.
I haven't been sleeping well of the past few days..too many stuff to think about.my brain is overload.
Today I finally met up with Nic and well he did tarots reading and some astrological stuff for me.
Not looking good. But oh well the destiny is still in my hands.
And..I've met up with clients again. Nic was so good to wait for me all these while.
Yesh.
My previous client introduce more clients to me.-.- it's a good thing but that explain why I'm dead tired.
And..this time..I have 3 clients.And I have to rush everything by sat. I'm really a superwoman now -_-'. Fucking tired.
These ppl I found out are like O_o...holding quite some position in big company =X okie. I shall not mention anything more here. Biz details are all private & confidential.
One are actively involve in NGO =X.
and they are like adults adults?quite senior people..I dunno how to explain..
But it gives me a sense of honour to be liasing and interacting with these people.wakakakak!okie lar i may be exagerating, but I'm appreciating these opportunities to learn and hone my people skill as well.
I was once told by an interviewer, the way I carry myself is consider way mature beyond my age. It's a compliment XD LOL!actioning!LOL!
I have these professional side of me I guess..when I'm down to work, I'll switch to the professional me O.o..I guess when dealing with these people, I tend to do that.
Other times I will still be the crazy wacko me?which that's why nobody can see me as the serious me?HAHAHAHAH!
Although having said that..I still can't see myself as that serious professional me..LOL LOL!it'll only appear when it requires me to..-_-!so I can't control it either.
Anyway I've hell lotsa work piling. I'm fucking tired. I still have to clean the house tomorrow and cook and the usual housechores.
Nic says I'm just like cinderella...lol..coping between studies, work, and house and the evil king at home..sigh I'm just living my life. I need to do something out of it. I have things I want to achieve in life. I don't want to live my life just like that. I need to stay focus. I'm tired.
I'm strong..u said..they said..everyone said...I dunno if I'm really am. But one thing for sure, I'm determining to break away from here. That's it.
It was really fun to be with you today. You can understand me that well because u understand my astrology signs and the spiritual world? I dunno. But it was like talking to an old friend..one that I seems to known for 10 years. Perhaps even the closest person to me may not completely understand certain things.but it seems like you do. We can't seems to stop talking as u said that's because our signs are in the same zone. hahaha. I feel so happy to have found a good friend like this. and you were so worried about me being cheated =X.thank you. although I know u won't be reading this. I still wanna say thank you. I've gained a lot today.
I've learned new things about sun sign. moon sign.water sign.gold star.fire sign today. I really hope one day I will be able to learn about tarots and astrology. It fascinates me a lot.
So many things demand my attentions. I am so busy. I know -_-" people doesn't believe how much of the stuff I am coping sometimes. Sigh.Today, my phone keep ringing. Nic can even see that and he totaly understand -_-" omigosh.arigato gozaimasu again. I'm really tired. I have to go on. I have no more time for play. Time to get serious.
© Enigma
0 person have hold my hands, have you?
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hold me TIGHT; and NEVER let go*
take my HAND; and GUIDE me through*
Sunday, May 17, 2009
5:14 AM
Busy
I'm still really busy lately.
Diu if nxt week bo call from the company I need to call them up already. wth I go tell them mid may -.- lol.
But I duwan to work yet la!
I've rejected several interviews because they simply are just too far away!HAHAHAHA!
lazy to travel lar....recession still so choosy..wtf is wrong with me!!!?
Lecturer's work still a lot not done also..damn!
Cause I was busy with my paid project. master's level project :o wakaka.
This time the client damn mafan -.- want extra stuff, meet up then need to xplain..I teach her stats sumore lol...she called me up many times also..wtf.sometimes irritating la..aiyer. she's a working adult and a mother btw =X.
zzz..lucky i charge her extra la of course.
But even though it's a work. I enjoyed it XD yeah.Call me a nerd -.-"
She praised me for doing a good job and being so patient with her.
*action sikit* I have my own code of professionalism also ma!chey chey~!hahaha!
Anyway I have to get my forms done too and application..oh shit I haven't call up the place about the exams..dammit.but I did book appt for macee nxt month though.
And that day I research and wrote down stuf from the various uni..wtf it's such acomplicated process to apply..they need so many stuff!!letter also havve own format!need to write essay also..niamaa..la!no time!
and to make mater worse I'm addicted to this fb game-Restaurant City! diu bo ?!
ARGHHhh!
so many list of stuff to do..and yet I'm slacking..burnout!
© Enigma
2 person have hold my hands, have you?
<< Home >>
hold me TIGHT; and NEVER let go*
take my HAND; and GUIDE me through*
Thursday, May 07, 2009
7:22 PM
Emoness of Roach Trouble
While cleaning the toilet..I met my nemesis AGAIN!!!!!! - MR/MRS. SIU KEONG AND FAMILY!!!
* the cute-tified version as I shall not put any disgusting pic of these bloody creatures and spoil the whole layout of my blog..dammit!
Last week were 2 cockroaches dammit..this week 3 cockroaches..1 big..1 medium 1 small..make up the whole family lar!??!niama.!!WTFF LAR!!I THINK IT'S THE RAINING SEASON LATELY...!!!or perhaps the roach family just decide to shift their cozy home to my toilet drain area..-_-..
Scenario:
Mama Roach: Hun, I think we should find a new spot, it's getting a lil' too crowded here with the new babies coming in and all..
Papa Roach: But dear..you do realize the property prices are sky high..and it's recession now, we're suppose to save money!!junior needs diaper money too :(..how can we afford!!?
Jr Roach 1: Papa..Mama!!guess what I found today while exploring the school grounds!!!*excitedly jumping up and down*
Papa & Mama Roach: What baby?what you saw?
Jr Roach 1: I found this big ..very big placeeee a cave...!!!so coool!!!and its so comfy inside!!!
Papa Roach: *lighbulb lighting up* ..hey I've got it!Let's all move there!!!
Mama Roach: Juniorss......pack up!we 're shifting!!
Jr Roach 1,2,3..........100: YES MAMA!!!!
.............and so the roach family have shifted to my toilet drainage hole area....
FUCK FUCK FUCK!!!!!!!FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I've killed one after another..there's no ending!!!AND I HAVE A PHOBIA SINCE I WAS SMALL!!!!!BECAUSE THESE DIGUSTING CREATURE CLIMB AND CRAWL ON MY SHOULDER..DAMMIT!!
USELESS PIECE OF ROACH SHIT...!!!!THEY SHOULD ALL ROT AND BURN..DOESN'T HELP THE ECOSYSTEM OR WHATSOEVER ARGHH!!!!
Every single time I remove the pail..these bloody roaches start to climb out..wtf!?!?I've asked dad countless time to buy that drain stopper thing..but to no avail..
How many times I scream and thrash the broom around like mad woman -_-"..omg..and the auntie behind can hear my screaming and hooligan/red indian shouts while I was in the whole process of killing all these bloody creatures..
AND YESH!I KILLED THEM HIT, WHACK AND SQUASH AND STEP!!!!I have to become brave -.-''..dammit..
my legs went jelly after that and I was shivering all over..imagine that..I'm really really scared..
Haihz...
Always it reminds me...
Last time, I would always scream for help...
She would always come to my aid without fail..even if she doesn't I will bug her till she does..
Mom: You know I'm scare too, but just kill it laa..what will you ever do without me yeah?what if I'm not around...*shakes head*
Me: *laughing jokingly..* thank you mummy..♥
Now...hahahaha it seems to have really happened..
Emo..
I miss you so muchh..so much.....
I'm so scared..so scared..
My legs went weak...
I'm shaking uncontrobally
Breakdown..
Droplets fell from my eyes...........
but still you'll never be here again...
I miss you.
So pain...so pain....I cannot breathe..my heart...
Who can understand this pain..help me take it away...please....
I need MIA....again...perhaps..
© Enigma
2 person have hold my hands, have you?
<< Home >>
hold me TIGHT; and NEVER let go*
take my HAND; and GUIDE me through*
Wednesday, May 06, 2009
9:50 PM
busy busy busy!!!
Extremely busy -_-"..really am..and I have to sleep early because of dad and the doctor's medicine crap..dammit..
Went for interview with a company and a high chances I will get hired..that why I need to rush all the things on hand..hopefully I'll get the call by end of this week or next week..!
Let see...
My Checklist (MAJOR & URGENT!):
- Lecturer's work
- Paid Project (data to be given to me by sat)
- Research uni info and make appt to go to MACEE
- Sit for TOEFL and GRE ( need to complete above before I can do this,fuck!i scared i miss the available dates for registrations!)
- Request for recommendation letters
- Application for various uni
- Get a job?=.= (On hold! I don't even have time to apply for jobs right now!)
Inquire and "korek" opportunities in designing with my unimate
oh fuck!of all urgent things I only get one done -_- diu bo!??!shit man!
Impt daily/weekly chores!!:
- Iron clothes (tomorrow -_-")
- Clean house and wash toilets (tomorrow -_-") diu...so much work
- Cook? (-_- that's almost everyday man!)
Sidelines (quite impt!):
- Stock more office wear
- Plan/organize redang trip for July/Aug/Sept (yesh babe -.- i know i've been pushing it,many things forgive me T_T)
- Plan/organize backpack trip in August too (diu -.- this one also hanging not planned)
- Plan darling PY bday!!!!
- Plan clubbing session!??!(babe see this!!ROFL!!!HAHAHAH!)
- Clear wardrobe
- Pack/File books and notes
Very the Sidelines:
- Contact huai huai
- Meet up with god brother
- Meet up with sing jeh
- Burn pictures into cd/thumbdrive
- Sell off my old stuff
- Read the books & mangas i bought ages ago ( many piling there and no time to read!!-_-)
- Design some stuff to build up my portfolio
- Watch all the movies I've downloaded ages ago
- Tons of game-related stuff to be done (ROFL!!still have time for these!?)
© Enigma
0 person have hold my hands, have you?
<< Home >>
hold me TIGHT; and NEVER let go*
take my HAND; and GUIDE me through*
Saturday, May 02, 2009
11:56 PM
Crush?
Today I have received another project.
Earning some side income.
AIkss..more work meaning no time..I got my lecturer's work to finish also ehs..shit!I dunno how im gonna cope..
I'm in deep shit I knew it.
Haihzz..
Lately..
I've let myself have a crush on someone I shouldn't have -_-' wtf?
I dunno. perhaps a replacement of him..of kor..
Just reminds me of kor so much.
from sg too -_-"
Haihz..
I've let myself fallen into something I shouldn't..
I know..
I need to wean him off =X that's it..
Aikss ppl only find u when he's bored..imagine that?
So I shouldn't care much too...
Yet why I have this infactuation towards this new guy-_-"
Sigh..
And lately I've been thinking about kor a lot..
why arhs?
what happen to me?damn..
emo period I guess..
Kor?
Don't even know what he thinking
Hot and cold..
Why you care for me so much when you duwan anything to happen!?
Because you are so afraid??
Sometimes I hate you for doing this to me..
Emo...
I don't need guys -_- seriously..dun need dun need!
© Enigma
1 person have hold my hands, have you?
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hold me TIGHT; and NEVER let go*
take my HAND; and GUIDE me through*
Friday, May 01, 2009
9:24 PM
Difficult times
Things are not exactly great right now.
Suffocating at home.
Stress.
Lots of work to be complete.the lecturer paid me in advanced to complete hell lotta work. and it's requires a lot of brain power -_-" and research..omg la..haihz
Tell me how long I need to live like this!?
Haihz..
He's not here when I need him.
It's going nowhere.
Kor?
I guess I just have to move on already.
Why you have to be so good to me then?!
I went to sg last month for some biz.
Met him, yesh.
He melt my heart again.damn.
When I thought there were no more feelings.
He spark it back.
He rush all the way from one end of sg to another end, just to see me for 30 minutes?
I told him no need to come all da way.
And he brought me belated birthday gifts.damn.
He wanted to sent me off at the airport but some emergency circumstances happened which I duwan to mention here.. (made me run around the bloody airport like mad woman and get home freaking late) -_-"
Sigh...
Are you so afraid?
Do you ever think when you’re all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?
It's been fucking 2 years..are u still so afraid?!
I guess I should let it go..but I why am I so hypnotized by you every single time...?
I don't want. Why?I really want to know what are you thinking?
Emo again.
© Enigma
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hold me TIGHT; and NEVER let go*
